Been there—quick reality check: there’s no way to read Facebook/Messenger without access to the phone or account; any iPhone “no-install” promise for FB chats is hype.
- Android: mSpy/eyeZy can grab Messenger after a 10–15 min install with Accessibility permission; needs physical access.
- iPhone: you won’t get FB chats (iCloud/jailbreak-free only pulls texts/calls); use Screen Time to limit/block Messenger or set downtime.
- Easy wins: check phone bill for data spikes, set Family Link/Screen Time, and use router DNS (CleanBrowsing/OpenDNS) for overnight.
- Safety settings (need access): tighten who can message her, turn on message requests filtering, lock down stories/reels to friends.
- GPS: Life360/Find My/Google Family for location + check-ins if that’s the main worry.
- Talk angle: set a house rule for periodic joint reviews or let her pick a trusted adult to spot-check.
Tell me iPhone or Android and I’ll map the exact steps.